I’ve got a thing against today. I’m not a fan. Every year, this day has a weird energy for me. And it has for a long time.

Growing up Unitarian Universalist, this was like the only “Holy Day” we celebrated. UU’s (as they’re called) are big fans of the earth so they make a big deal of earth day.

As I grew up, I started noticing some strange things always went down on this day. I went through a strange period of my life- years- where this day had particularly strange significance that I’m not going to go into here and now but rest assured if I told you the story you’d be like, “Huh. Weird.”

One year I was convinced I got over the strange day and ventured out into LA. That day, I had my newly upgraded phone stolen and very nearly got into 3 accidents to and from an event.

Last year, I thought for sure I broke the curse. I stayed in, had a very relaxed day, and didn’t make any rash decisions. Only to realize I bought tickets for a festival that I had to cancel 3 weeks later because of a different engagement and, despite having bought travel insurance for the tickets, ended up losing $150 of my investment.

I don’t like April 22.

But I’m feeling different about it this year. I feel like last year for many reasons was the end of an era. So far, 2015 has been a whole different experience for me socially, career-wise, and romantically. Some sort of shift took place. I don’t yet know what it is (because are we really ever able to see these things as they’re happening when we only have pieces of the puzzle but no real picture yet of how they fit in?), but I know it’s happened.

So I’m still taking it easy today. And after years of this day having a strange energy around it for me, I’m not looking to tempt the fates. But I do feel like I’m slowly emerging from a whirlwind tunnel that’s been taking place and always come to a head this day. I’m calmer than I’ve ever been about it. And actually genuinely excited and intrigued to see how it will all play out.

I’ll keep you updated.