Crash Bam Boom

Last weekend I had a rare Saturday free. I was planning on doing a bunch of things, but didn’t really have anything specific on the docket. So instead of being my normal, hyperproductive self… I crashed.

I even took a picture as proof. crash

That’s me face down on top of a clothes pile on my bed holding a beer.

I would like to point at that at least the floor around me was relatively tidy. Pretty proud of that.

Basically my day went like this: Sleep in until 11:30ish. Meditate. Putz around the apartment. Eat. Workout. Do dishes. Put clothes away. Go for a walk. Meditate again. Eat again. Another walk for a snack. Some staring at the computer screen. Some texts convincing people I was too busy to go out. Some more putzing. Do required writing for class tomorrow. Bed.

That’s it.

And- even though I didn’t yet have my Matthew McConaughey-style-motivation, I’m still pretty proud of that day. It was needed. It was the first time in weeks I exhaled. It was the first day I did whatever I wanted and barely talked to anyone around me. It was a me-day. And it felt good.

I had a lot of stresses- personal, financial, and career-oriented- over the past couple months. I just kept plowing through them without taking time to relax. And last Saturday, I finally just let myself relax.

And even though I wasn’t productive, I set myself up for a much more well-rested, energetic, and productive rest of the week. I think I need these crashes every once in a while.

 

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Back to the grind

ocl montage 1

For the past couple months, I’ve put a lot of stuff on the back burner in order to focus on finishing the filming and production of my web series, The Other Client List. 

We finished filming on Saturday. I couldn’t be more proud, grateful and excited. It’s been an adventure and I’m glad to know it’s really only the start of the adventure.

On Sunday, I let myself sleep in. Then looked at the “To Do” list I’d been putting off…and had a little freakout.

Then once it was over, I stood up (did I mentioned I was curled into a ball on the floor?), took a deep breath, and got to work.I let myself freak out for a minute. It’s ok to sometimes feel overwhelmed. It’s ok to feel frustrated. And it’s ok to be true to whatever your feeling in the moment. I didn’t want to fight the freakout. I just allowed it.

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I think part of what was overwhelming me was not knowing how much I actually had put off and not knowing how it would all get done. So I just started attacking it step by step. I did some cleaning and organizing. I looked through piles of papers and figured out what goes where and what needs to be addressed. I made some phone calls and sent some emails. I did my taxes. Not all of them, but I figured out what I could get done that day, did it, and have an action plan in place for the final steps to finish them.

I even took a couple hours off midday to laugh with one of my favorite people.

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Even though there’s still plenty to do in both the web series, my personal goals, and at least eight other major projects I’m workin

g on, I’m ready for it. I want this life. I want a life of projects. Which means I’m ok with having times of being overwhelmed. Because everything is a balance. You just have to give yourself every advantage to learn to handle it. That way it gets easier over time. Just like everything else you practice.

I’m still learning. But at least I got a good practice meltdown and recover session in yesterday. I feel good about that.

So now it’s time to get back to the grind. Bring it.

Overwhelmed or Underwhelmed?

I can’t decide if I do better when I put too much on my plate or when there’s plenty of space available.

Like right now, I technically don’t have any deadlines. I have a week before the next podcast needs to be published. I should really get working on it.

But because nothing is pressing, I painted my nails. Two-toned paint job. WTF.

It’s always an extreme for me. Not sure how to find that moderate.