Crop Top

crop topI never thought I could pull off a crop top. I mean, look at this guy. I don’t look like him!

Growing up, I was always most self-conscious about my stomach. It’s where I hold most of my weight. It’s the last thing to start toning out when I am getting in shape. I’m not shaped like a tiny slender stomached chick. I’m more athletic (when at my best) so only making major cuts and really going out of my way to work it make a difference.

I’ve gone on about this before.

But as I’ve gotten slowly more confident with my body and pushed the limits of my own shape… I’ve ventured out in my dress too. I’ve actually worn crop tops on occasion.

I feel so naughty for even admitting it! AH!

I’m from Indiana. We don’t wear crop tops there. I certainly never wore them or even considered such a dramatic clothing choice. But I’ve slowly let the land of the people who are more bold and confident with their body and clothing seep into my own thinking. I’m not saying my shirts are that short… but sometimes a little tummy can peek out. And I don’t get self-conscious. And I’m proud of that. Not because I look like a photoshopped fitness model. But because I look good. And I work on it.

But more importantly, I work constantly on being ok with me. So if that means wearing modest crop tops without embarrassment because they make me sort of feel like a rockstar, so be it. Bring on the scissors. I’ve got a tiny sliver of stomach to let peep out.

FroYo Friend

Last weekend an old man and I had the same idea.froyo

Slow down there, buddy. Keep it G-rated.

I went to the gym and was lifting my tookus off. I have to go really hard on the days I do go because I’ve been so busy lately, I can only get there 3-4 days per week. So I have to make each workout count.

While I was there, a trainer with an older man came by and was looking for a weight. I knew the weight was hidden behind the rack because I saw it and I giggled about it earlier. I pretended the weight was scared of everyone and was playing an epic game of hide and seek.

DON’T YOU JUDGE ME. I LIFT WHILE HUNGRY AND MY MIND GOES A LITTLE WACKY.

Anyway, I ratted the weight out and told the trainer where it was. He said thank you. The guy he was training didn’t look happy with me. I guess he was enjoying his rest time.

I didn’t think more about it- except I did realize the trainer was exactly like a popular stand up showcase producer in town so then I giggled more to myself picturing this comedian in his suit at the weight room trying to get people to come to his shows while lifting weights. So I giggled some more and finished up my workout.

WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT JUDGING ME!@?

…like I was saying, I finished my workout then worked for a while at home. Then I decided to treat myself to a relaxing walk and some delicious frozen yogurt (aka FroYo for the SoCal doucheys).

I go to my usual joint, get my usual three sample cups (one more than customary because I’m a rebel), and start my usual sampling of all the flavors before I get the same flavor and put so many toppings on it, it doesn’t even matter.

And who do I see?! The old man who was working with the trainer earlier in the morning! He had the same idea I did for the day! Go to the gym then eat all (and more) of it back with froyo later in the day!

It’s a small, small world. Filled with fat, fat people.